Author: Poppy

We’ve had a long day. Lots accomplished. They’ve started painting the final coats of paint on all the trim in this house. The dining room is gorgeous. The hardwood flooring installation (in the new den) begins in the morning. The wood was delivered this morning. As of now and weather permitting, I think I’ll have this finished in about 3 weeks time. Hoping. At that point, professional photographs will be made (I’ll share with you) and the house will be appraised and listed.

I asked father to give me the perfect song (yet again) to share with you. It actually came this morning when I awakened. While I don’t know why, I have been really emotional about you (and us) again. I have this book with me and I love the picture on the cover. I’ve gazed at this face many times. Anyway, I just miss you so much and want to be with you….take care of you and our little family. I opened my computer and and this song (that I’ve never heard) was the first option. How WONDERFUL it would be for my phone to ring or see a text from YOU?!! What if you said, “Poppy…RUN!! RUN…don’t walk…It’s time to come home!” The thought makes me cry.

I hope you’ve enjoyed a nice day and your tummy is full of good food? Get some good sleep, okay? Keep me close. You know where I am. I love you, B. I love you so much. xo

“Every road leads back to my son…”

“My son, when my days are finally done, say I lived, I loved…but I TRIED for MY son…yeah I TRIED for you MY SON”

Hey, honey…busy here!!! Yikes! No matter, wanted to jump on here and say hello and share with you. This song is precious. Every word. Listen closely. What could be more important? As I’ve said – it’s true, we’ll be more like PawPaw’s but still…precious days! I hope you’re having a nice day. It’s rained here on and off…cleared out now. We’re keeping this car on the road…so desperately looking forward to the destination. I hope you’re safe and in good spirits. I love you so much! xo

WHAT IF it had been Puppy & Poppy off to see the world? Remember “Moon RIver”? That’s my dream…to fly through the skies with Puppy. Forever keeping a watchful eye on him and our boys.

Memaw and me. 1998. We had so much fun that day! The queen was in a horrible mood…but Memaw and I had a ball. She was feisty as hell!! WHAT IF she had known me as your spouse? WHAT IF she’d met our boys?

Memaw’s creole. I made this for you in late April, 2015. I hope I did her recipe justice. I cannot wait to make it for you again. WHAT IF you’re able to taste this again soon? Are you ready? Hungry, baby?

Your papa and Poppy. We had a good time visiting that day. He was always so nice to me. I told you several years ago that he came to my house in Oak Grove. He lingered. Like most men…y’all were more alike than you realize. Affection and pleasure is wherever you find it. Just facts. Of course, nothing ever happened. WHAT IF he’d met his grandsons that came into this world through you? PS – this photo got water damaged.

How wonderful if fate had placed us together sooner. I’ve always been close. WHAT IF it had been Poppy waiting in this grand car for you after a game? To be sure, I would have NEVER pushed you away (with an ugly attitude) and proclaimed “you stink!” I would have sat close…pulled your head to my tummy and played with your hair – stinky or not!

WHAT IF we’ve been connected for eons?

I These invoices and packing slips displaying our names TOGETHER give me so much joy. Somehow I know they foretell far more important documents that await us in the near future. WHAT IF our names are already written on a marriage doc (in spirit) and awaiting us to manifest that special day?

WHAT IF this collage foretells the near future? Somehow I know it does. I’m so excited, Puppy.

The PERFECT song to display my heart today. EVERY. WORD. Listen closely…the song describes two separate people that are spiritually ONE. Each can feel the others pain and joy.

I’m working here today but had been wanting to share this post for so long. Today is the day!! I’ve always been there. I hope you’re enjoying this day and your tummy is full. Did someone make you a yummy breakfast, honey? I wonder if you went to Waffle House? haha. I wish I could have made you some pancakes with maple syrup! And…whatever else you wanted. It’s been so long since I saw a text that asked “salad ready?” Lol. Hopefully soon you’ll not be hiding in your room waiting for your salad and dinner! Hopefully you can be with me while I cook. I know someone didn’t want you around me until it was time to eat – not a minute before. Sad. Imagine what a fun day this could have been if we’d taken the boys out. So much to look forward to, right?!

Keep me close…you know where I am. I love you, baby. xo

This little video was one of the sweetest gifts I’ve ever received. So very simple (only seconds) but so profound as your precious love was on full display! In all the world, only you and I knew this. Imagine all the sweet (but subtle) communication we’ve shared? Oh, the chances we’ve taken over the past 10-20 years.

You’ve given her literally EVERYTHING – the privilege of your hand at childhood dances, was her handsome prom date, mansions, cars, private flights, debts paid, plastic surgeries, audiences of celebrities & presidents…you’ve given her great power over others, wealth and status…yet, even on this very day – she feels you’ve failed her somehow? In her mind, you have many wrongs to “make right” and lots to “make up” to her?! Hmmmmm. No doubt, she feels (unbelievably) that you OWE her? I KNOW this for a fact, first hand. Truly…unreal. Textbook borderline. Delusional covert narcissist.

All I’ve ever had the privilege of enjoying is LOVING and SERVING you – yet still, on this day, that’s my greatest joy and wish for the future. If you’re well cared for, then I’m happy. To love and care for you and our sweet little family – that’s the dream. I was gifted the warmth of your hand in mine one special (and very quick) moment during that powerful early morning prayer. I was gifted this sweet little video the morning after you’d received your jacket. As you’ll remember, I felt overwhelmed seeing you there being honored and unable to be with you. I had left you that sad voicemail post…l’d posted it later the same night after you’d gotten your jacket.

You’ve given me so many sweet little “hidden” gifts – all of which I am grateful for. Not ONE was material but so special. Another that comes to mind – it was an evening that you’d felt the great heaviness of my heart perfectly. It was when we’d gone to dinner at MaLi here in midtown. Y’all were here for the Volley Tourney. You’ll remember well when we sat down in that booth – you were against the wall, she was in the middle and I was on the outer portion of the bench. It’s true, my heart was so heavy. I wanted you so much….to BE WITH YOU (just us) so badly. She was acting out (per usual…being rude). I looked past her face and over at you…in that moment, you gazed back at me with the deepest stare I’ve ever experienced in my life. In those seconds, I fell into the abyss of your eyes. You HELD that stare for several seconds. I was immediately restored. I felt as light as a feather. It was like I was floating. We’d touched. Visually. Soulfully. Absolutely. Unquestionably. We were connected and NO ONE could STOP IT…or what is surely COMING in the future – even on this day. Somehow I know that we (and our boys) are destiny.

I have said many times, “I’m not sure you can know how much I love you, even I don’t fully understand it?” But, know what? After all these years, I feel confident that YOU KNOW how much Poppy loves you. If I leave this world today, I am 100% confident that YOU KNOW. It makes me cry.

We’re working here today. I hope you’re enjoying this day for we’ll never see this one again. Keep me close, okay? You know where I live – I’m literally inside your heart at this very moment. I love you, Puppy. xo

LINK to video I made…(only shows an arrow). Play it.

I was loved by Puppy…xo